Steal This Penis.

I must confess, I don’t really understand the extreme aversion, among certain quarters of the American population*, to the very idea of gun control. When I bring up the subject, some of my liberal American friends suggest that their opponents’ love of guns is rooted in Freudian considerations. I generally have dismissed these arguments as so much vulgar partisan point-scoring**.

But quite frankly, in the aftermath of the recent massacres, I am beginning to wonder whether or not at least some (though, I need to stress, by no means all) of them may in fact be influenced by this very idea.

Exhibit A is this lengthy, unhinged rant scrawled by someone calling himself “Big Bad Jim***” on Clarissa’s blog a few months ago. I’m not in the habit of bowdlerizing direct quotes, so you have been warned:

So this is what passes for today’s academics: Ratty, pudgy faced screeching harridans and elderly hippies that will tell you that gay bath houses, trannies, and socialism are all healthy, acceptable facets of modern society – and that self defense and wholesome shooting sports are not.

Listen, dummies – us gun owners don’t CARE what idiots like you think anymore. The debate was over before that idiot in the Oval Office was even a blip on the electroral radar. All he’s done is sell more guns than the NRA.

Here’s the deal: we will be keeping our guns and ammo, thank you very much, we WILL buy on the black market if that black idiot in the Whitehouse gets stupid about it, and we will send your cops back to you in boxes if they start having problems distinguishing between guns and tampons and lawful citizens and criminals.

Notice the bizarre non-sequitur about ‘tr*nnies’ in the first paragraph? Why would this man even mention us if not as a manifestation of some sort of castration anxiety?

Of course, not all of them are like this. For example, recently a number of have to taken to twitter to defend their positions using logic and evidence.

Hahaha, no I’m lying; they’re using rape jokes:

Charming people, the lot of them no doubt.

Now, in all fairness, a few Republicans actually are willing to come out and smack down their partisans for this utter bullshit. And once again, not all opponents of gun control are like this. But I submit that those who apparently are incapable of talking about gun control without screeching to high heaven about ‘tr*nnies’ and rape must have something seriously wrong with them. To them I can say only this: Gun control is not equivalent to having your penis stolen. Now grow the fuck up.


*And the Canadian one as well, but much less so; there is no mainstream politician, to my knowledge, who seriously advocates for public ownership of assault weapons.

**Of course, it’s fair to say that I can’t really identify with most psychosexual theories anyway, so I’m probably biased against them.

***Which, by the way, sounds very much like something that someone who is completely unsecure in his masculinity would insist upon calling himself. Just saying.

About thevenerablecorvex

I have the heart of a poet, the brain of a theoretical physicist, and the wingspan of an albatross. I am also notable for my humility.
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6 Responses to Steal This Penis.

  1. Believe me, when I first heard this theory I didn’t believe it either. But the evidence is just overwhelming. Every discussion on the subject makes people spew endless sexual references. There has got to be something to this.

  2. Leah Jane says:

    After the millionth tweet/comment I came across where a drooling right-winger screamed about Obama “raping (sic) my constitutional rights”, I can’t ignore the connection any longer.

  3. Pingback: Everybody Is Catching Up | Clarissa's Blog

  4. Lindsay says:

    That guy’s reaction is especially weird given that Clarissa wasn’t even arguing that nobody should own guns! She was just saying that *she* didn’t want to have to keep one in her classroom!

    I guess that’s another feature of insecure masculinity: indifference, or anything other than complete, fawning approval from a woman is the same thing as hostility in his mind.

  5. Pingback: Nailed It. | voxcorvegis

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