We all need to sit down at some point and have a deep, meaningful discussion as to why our children are so damn stupid.
Now, personally, I’ve not noticed that children are particularly dumb; indeed, I seem to recall being quite clever myself as a child, if a lot more ignorant of the world around me, and perhaps a little more arrogant. But apparently, my experience is not typical, since Men and Women of Culture and Learning have lately taken to pointing out just how pathetically inept and easily confused that the average child must be.
For example, it seems that these days, you can’t teach the Theory of Evolution by Natural Selection to students in Louisiana high schools because the poor, befuddled darlings will lose their bearings and become hopelessly confused.
Lest you think that that this particular brand of stupidity is limited to the Southern United States, it is my sad duty to inform my countrymen that it has apparently spread to Ontario, where children are so delicate that even learning of the existence of transgender people in public schools will result in a downward spiral into nihilism, drug addiction, and death. And of course, children in the Province of Quebec are, by their own mother’s admission, physiologically incapable of understanding that religions other than Catholicism exist.
And no less august an authority than Caiden Cowger agrees with this assessment. In Mr. Cowger’s experience, teenagers these days are such monumental morons that the very act of hearing President Obama express tolerance towards homosexuality is enough to convince them that they themselves are gay. Well, I must say that if ever there was a good argument for youths being idiots, the fourteen year-old Mr. Cowger makes it effortlessly!
But it’s time to move beyond the simply asking the question of whether kids are stupid, because the weight of expert opinion seems to be firmly in one quarter. It’s about time that we started discussing the specifics. Just how stupid are these children? Are we talking “the Flintstones was a documentary”-level stupid or “Stephen Harper is Canada’s greatest Prime Minister”-level stupid? What’s causing this stupidity? Is there anything we can do to stop it? Or is it too late?